Transforming Holiday Triggers into Growth

In partnership with

🍁 Good morning, Feast Makers! Thanksgiving week is upon us, bringing its share of delicious moments—and perhaps a few challenging emotional “side dishes”. This week, we’re turning triggers into powerful opportunities for personal growth. Every week, I write for my own healing, but this week’s story in particular, had me crying it out more than once. It’s a bit longer than normal, but I hope some of you will relate and find real value in it.

IN TODAY’S EDITION

• Holistic Spotlight: Holiday Triggers: The Gifts that Keep on Giving

• Offer of the Day: Free Thanksgiving Conversation Cards

• What's Happening This Week: Wellness events to take a break from the hustle

• Your Healing Minute: Cultivating Compassion for Others

BUT FIRST, A QUICK MESSAGE FROM THIS WEEK’S SPONSOR:

My go to holiday drink!

How many magical creams and trendy serums have we wasted money on, only to be left with half-used jars? When skincare products don’t deliver, the answer lies within. True skin health starts at the cellular level, with deep hydration,elasticity, and a strong barrier. Enter Pique’s Radiant Skin Duo—a simple ritual of Sun Goddess Matcha and B·T Fountain electrolytes. Packed with antioxidants, ceramides, chlorophyll, and hyaluronic acid, it nourishes skin from within for a lasting glow! For a limited time get 20% off on Pique’s best sellers!

Get 20% off on best sellers + a free starter kit!!

HOLISTIC SPOTLIGHT

Holiday Triggers: The Gifts That Keep on Giving 

No matter how you spend it, Thanksgiving can feel like an emotional potluck. You may be dealing with "side dishes" of grief, family conflicts, or spending the day alone. These circumstances, though challenging, hold incredible potential for healing and personal growth.

The following is an open letter to me. Advice and suggestions for me to fall back on when dealing with intense emotions. They all come from lived experiences. It is my desire to continue turning triggers into personal transformations. If you're facing something similar this Thanksgiving, I hope you find value in these words.

1. Respond to emotional triggers with curiosity and calm.

Triggers often highlight unresolved emotions or unmet needs. Instead of resisting or reacting impulsively, try to: 

• Pause and breathe: Inhale for 4 counts and exhale for 6 to center yourself. 

• Acknowledge what you're feeling: "This is anger," or "This is sadness." 

• Avoid blame: Focus on your own feelings without assigning blame to others or to yourself. 

• Ask questions: "What need or wound is being uncovered by this trigger?" And then answer with vulnerability and authenticity. 

Example: You're alone on Thanksgiving due to a toxic family dynamic. Instead of thinking, "They don't care to understand me," try: "I often feel undervalued around them." Then, explore why and what you can do to meet your needs. This approach keeps you focused on self-care and avoids assumptions about the intentions of others.

2. Cultivate compassion for yourself.

The holidays can surface difficult emotions like shame, grief, anger, anxiety, or loneliness. Meeting yourself with kindness is a huge step toward healing. Consider these reframes the next time difficult emotions arise. 

• Shame: "I heal more through grace than through shame, and I choose to offer that grace to myself right now."

• Grief: "This sadness is a natural part of the healing process. It's okay that my heart hurts today."

• Anger: "It's understandable that I'm feeling angry right now. My anger is signaling that something important needs my attention."

• Anxiety: "I’m not sure if she likes me, and it’s natural to feel social anxiety in this uncertainty. Admitting this empowers me to choose when and how to interact with her."

• Loneliness: "This loneliness is a cue that I need deep, authentic relationships. I can take intentional steps to cultivate new connections or repair broken ones. Meanwhile, I will be gentle with myself and engage in activities that bring me comfort.”

3. Cultivate compassion for others. 

Choosing compassion when we feel hurt or hostile is hard. But it often leads to better outcomes. It is a profound and transformative practice endorsed by Jesus, Buddha, Socrates, Gandhi, and many other great philosophers. It means seeing the humanity in everyone. This includes those we disagree with or who have hurt us. It requires us to move beyond our own perspectives and emotions. It is HARD. But it heals relationships, reduces stress, and allows for necessary collaboration. It has the power to break cycles of hate and can spark deep personal and global change. To practice it:

• Connect with empathy. If you had their exact life experience, you would think and behave exactly as they do. Understand that their experiences are just as valid as yours. (This doesn't excuse harmful behaviors; see boundary setting below.)

• Act from compassion. Choose words and actions that show a desire to understand. Aim to reduce suffering, and work for the common good, even if you disagree. And remember that the Thanksgiving table is not the place to solve deep-seated grievances.

• If you lose your cool, acknowledge that you are not in the right frame of mind to have a compassionate conversation, ask for forgiveness, and give yourself space to calm down. 

Compassion isn't easy, but it is a worthy pursuit, one with the potential to change the trajectory of humanity.

(At the end of today's newsletter, in the "healing minute" section, you'll find a short meditation to help cultivate compassion. Consider using it before your gathering.)

4. Set healthy boundaries.

Setting boundaries is essential for maintaining emotional well-being. They can help with everything from unintentional faux pas to malicious remarks. 

• Be clear and respectful: "I prefer not engaging in political conversations at parties. Do you enjoy bird watching? I just got a new feeder, and it’s fascinating!”

• Express the impact and set clear expectations: "I feel hurt by what just happened, and I need to prioritize my well-being. I will have to leave in order to protect my peace if I don't feel welcome here."

• Think it through, then follow through. Before setting a boundary, consider the possible consequences—like spending Thanksgiving alone. Choose your boundaries carefully. Once they are set, honor them to build trust in yourself and to teach others how to respect you.

Finally, keep in mind that setting boundaries isn't about controlling others or keeping people out. It's about communicating what you need in order to let people in.

*A note on safety: If it's not safe to express your feelings and assert your needs, prioritize your safety above all else. Seek support from trusted loved ones and professionals. Sometimes, boundaries must be internal until it's safe to express them externally.

5. Celebrate Growth

Each time you handle a trigger calmly, set a healthy boundary, or show yourself compassion, acknowledge it!

"I did better than last year."

"This experience taught me a big lesson." 

"I'm proud of myself for honoring my need for rest."

Celebrating your growth increases self-awareness and resilience. It cultivates gratitude for your journey and reinforces the positive changes you're making.

Closing Thoughts

This Thanksgiving, when your triggers are served alongside the main course, chew on them with compassion and intentionality. Turn them into opportunities for healing and creating the life you want.

Happy Thanksgiving.

WHAT’S HAPPENING THIS WEEK

Wellness Related Events Around Town

🫶 Anxiety Support Group | Nov. 25 @ 3 pm | Free Online

Join our supportive circle where we navigate the journey of anxiety together. In this one-hour session, we'll share experiences, coping strategies, and insights to help you find resilience and peace in the midst of life's challenges. Whether you're seeking understanding or offering support, our Anxiety Support Circle is a safe space for connection, empathy, and growth. Come as you are, and let's foster a community that uplifts each other on the path to calmness and well-being. Reserve your free spot here.

🧘‍♂️ Mindful Yoga Flow for Your Mental Wellness | Nov. 27 @ 5:30 | Free Online

Interspersed with mindful moments, students will make connections between yoga class and their daily life by encouraging the use of yoga tools beyond the studio space to support mental health and overall wellness. Each month we introduce a special theme to focus our practice. Combining sun salutations, standing and seated postures, we will transition through sequences of poses that build strength and flexibility, while flowing with intentional awareness on all levels - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. The class is appropriate for all skill levels. Reserve your free spot here.

👟 After Thanksgiving Walking Group | Nov. 29 @ 10 am | Social Fit Wellness, Nottingham

Kick off your Black Friday with a free, refreshing walk designed to help you feel great after Thanksgiving! Whether you indulged in an extra slice of pie or just want to feel less guilty about over-eating, this walk is the perfect way to get moving, boost your metabolism, and start the day energized. We'll start with a good warm up stretch, then go for a scenic walk in the park, then a cool down stretch. Ideal for all fitness levels.

🧚‍♂️ North Pole Lights Walk | Select dates, Nov 29 - Dec 29 @ 4:30 pm | Willow Oak Flower & Herb Farm, Severn

Take a self-guided adventure to the North Pole! Enjoy magical garden scenes, visit Santa in the Garden Cabin, and take photos in his sleigh. Accessible but some areas may be challenging. Pets are not allowed, service dogs only. Tickets are $12/adult, $8/child. In case of inclement weather, tickets are transferable to another evening. More Information and Purchase Tickets here.

🎇 Soft Life Sunday Wellness Day | Dec 1 @ 12:30 pm | BMore Empowered Center, Baltimore

Close out the new year with intention. Join us for a nurturing and uplifting experience designed to recharge your spirit, ground your energy, and perpare you for the new year ahead. You’ll experience a gentle yoga practice, reflections and sharing, empowerment activities, a coloring meditation, essential oils, giveaways and more. More information and Registration here.

🫁 The Baltimore Breathwork Sound Bath 7th Anniversary Class | Dec 1 @ 2:15 pm | The Roland Park Community Center, Baltimore

Join us for an immersive and intentional experience. Through intentional breathing techniques and carefully curated sounds, you will be guided on a journey of self-discovery and healing. No prior experience is necessary. More information and Registration here.

YOUR HEALING MINUTE

Cultivating Compassion Meditation

Compassion is like a muscle. It needs to be strengthened and stretched regularly to remain healthy and help you with your daily tasks. Today’s healing minute is going to take a little longer than one minute. We’re going to spend 10 minutes cultivating our compassion muscle. I don’t know about you, but I need at least 10 minutes to prepare my heart to be compassionate with others. Consider this meditation before attending your Thanksgiving gatherings. I hope it keeps you grounded as you navigate the challenges of the season.

That’s all for today’s newsletter. Be well!

Until next time,